Life Theory #1 - Circle of Friends

So I have these theories about life. Today I share my first, I call it my Circle of Friends theory. It is neither deep, nor particularly sophisticated, but has made me think about life a bit differently of late.

It goes a little something like this.

I think that through the natural course of events in life, we tend to surround ourselves with friends that are very similar to ourselves. Be it from the perspective of athleticism, ambition/drive, intelligence, or even career success, odds are that you are on par with, or close to par with, the friends in your unique circle. Think of it visually as you and each of your friends being nodes on a circle.

To be sure, there might be differnces between you and your friends in terms of a specific characteristic, but overall, I would say the theory holds. Think of the likelihood of being really close with someone who is a world class athlete if you are a couch potato, or with a data entry clerk if you are a CEO; or with a super driven worker who puts in crazy hours and attends seminars etc. if you religiously punch a clock and wouldn't consider working a minute of OT. Please don't misinterpret, I am not passing judgement on any of the types of people outlined above - I am merely suggesting that the context in which we live our lives can make it very challenging to find common ground which to relate to people who live within a different context.

While this alignment with people of similar ilk happens naturally, I would also suggest that this can lead to a group think, and/or sedentation of thought. As we get older, it becomes easier to believe that what we are doing is resonable as we look around and see that our friends are doing the same thing. This is the essence of keeping up with the Jones -- so and so bought one, so I need to buy something similar, or ideally, bigger. But doesn't this work pretty much the same way with a variety of other issues also. For example, if the people you are most comfortable with and associate with the most are unambitious and prefer not to travel, mightn't it be likely that you will be the same way? I would suggest that it does indeed.

Now, while this may provide us with comfort and lead to a life that we understand and relate to easily, I would also suggest that the greatest growth and development of a person happens when they interact with people that belong to a different circle. For a visual, imagine that you and your friends are nodes on one of the rings in the Olympic emblem. But, as the logo suggests, there are other circles in addition to your own, each with people appreciablly different from those on your circle.

Now I am by no means saying that we should all turn our backs on the friendships that we have developed over months, years, and sometimes a lifetime - that would be foolish by all accounts. I am suggesting, however, that we stand to grow a fair bit by expanding our circle of contacts and listening to what those from other circles have to say. Visually, I am suggesting that you put your circle at the centre, and distribute the other circles you introduce into your life around your circle, much like the petals of a flower.

What will be the result? Well, my personal belief is that everyone in this world has something to teach me, so by introducing more and more circles into my life, I can't help but broaden the lessons I will be taught. Will all encounters and interactions be joyful and blissful? By no means. Keep in mind that people on other circles can hold oppossing views, values, morals, and just about anything else as well. As such, there will be times when they behave in a way that is different from how you would. They may even offend and/or hurt you, who knows. But overall, the process is worth it. You will get a better appreciation for how others on this planet live their lives, and you may be exposed to a variety of new and exciting activities, thoughts, and concepts that will greatly enrich your life.

So get out there, and grow your circles.

That is My Two Cents on this day.